On the 1st of April ’98, in an allegedly bright room with a waterfall in a corner at St. Martha’s Hospital, I was born. Despite, slightly disappointing my parents by having male genitalia, I was loved. 15 years and the 5ft 11 inches later, that baby writes. That baby recalls the times he succeeded and the times he failed (the latter being more), that baby recalls the evolution of his ego, that baby writes about the times of smiles and times of sorrow (the former being more, sorrow is for the weak. Ego Evolution explained), that baby recalls the pathetic lies told and the pathetic lies he bought (Thank you, brother for making me believe you were going to rob a bank one night), that baby recalls and on he recalls. The baby reminisces. I do understand how ‘Memoirs of a Scrawny Kid of 15’ wouldn’t be a contender for the Pulitzer as I have but completed the first quarter of my life.

I have the latter part of my life, hopefully laden with success, failure, smile, sorrow, lies, truth, adventure and more all yet to unravel. Because I see truth in the phrase, The World Is Your Oyster. It’s what you make of it! Always has been! Always will be! It’s our duty to take it to new heights-and laugh at the people below before you give them a helping hand- or fuck it all up. I take blame for not climbing as high as I wanted to in the former 15, but this is me taking shit into my own hands- Do not fucking take that literally- before it hits the fan!

Conclusion: I’ve been a guest on this planet for 15 godly years. You’re welcome, Earth. Also, it’s time I got a new motto:

Carpe Diem, Bitches!

– Anirudh Sridhar